Things to do instead of thinking and crying about your ex

The title is pretty self-explanatory, I guess. Here is a list of all the things you could do – and should do – instead of torturing yourself about that cheater, liar and manipulator of an ex.

1. Meditate, or start yoga, or do stretching exercises everyday to improve your flexibility

Do something that eases both your body and your mind. Take time to focus on the physical feelings and how they connect to your psyche. Trust me, it works. And it's pretty efficient.

2. Cook your favourite meal and also try new recipes

I have been craving not just for new types of food, but also for me to take care of myself, of my health and ........ of my taste buds. Yeah. Cooking for yourself, and even for others (invite your friends and family, hey!), makes you feel good about yourself. It's as simple as that.

3. Start a new hobby: drawing, sewing, singing, writing, scrapbooking ... 

Get handy and get creative! When I go through a rough breakup, I just want to try new things or get back to old hobbies I kind of ditched long ago. Lately, I've been wanting to do pixel art and digital drawing again.

4. Do sports

Oh. Yeah. This one can sound a bit annoying – it is for me at least. But getting into shape WHILE exercising will produce oxytocin, which is basically the hormone of happiness. Yeah. You'll feel great about yourself, whether it is by joining a club, doing pilates at home or going to the gym or to the public swimming pool.

5. Journal

Journaling is a great way to cope with your emotions when you've been annoying your friends too much about the breakup and the ex and how devastated you feel (yeah I've been through that). You feel much more relieved after writing it all down, even if your tears are pouring out on the paper at that moment. You can describe the whole situation, your feelings, add quotes that speak to you and to your soul ... you can literally do anything. Free your mind. Write those feelings and emotions down.

6. Go out

Ohhh, this one is “easy” (not all the time, though, I agree). Yeah, I know people will advise you not to do that only because getting drunk and crazy and having fun with your friends for one night will only erase those sad moments and feelings temporarily, and when you wake up the next day, your head aches both from your hangover and those feelings kicking in again after you tried to push them away for one night. BUT you should still do it. Go out. Have fun. Have drinks with friends, go to clubs, dance like you've never danced before. Notice the guys around you, whose attention you caught. Yeah, you'll still have work to do on yourself before being completely okay again when you get home from that night, but just enjoy the moment.

7. Talk

I said that journaling is a great way to connect more with yourself and stop annoying your friends and family with your sadness, but in no way it means that you should completely stop telling them about how you feel. If you feel like your world is falling apart, consider getting therapy and seeing a psychologist. It helps. A lot.

8. Do your nails at the salon, buy new clothes and shoes

Literally!! This!! Treat yourself because you deserve it so so much. ♡

9. Don't refrain yourself from saying what you think and calling out people on their bullshit

You might certainly feel like you didn't tell that ex everything he should have heard. You might feel like he didn't even see you get mad for real and tell him how wrong he did you, and how poorly and bad he treated you. As from now on, you will. Whether it's a guy you're dating, or your friends, or basically anyone. Don't be afraid to speak up and make them understand they're acting like shit with you and they can't do that.

10. Remind yourself that, for every relationship that is to come (and that is over too), you shouldn't ask yourself "Am/Was I good enough for him?" but "Is/Was he good enough for me?"

Get on your side. Think on and from your side. You're your own team. Cheer for yourself. It's all about your OWN peace of mind, not theirs. Set limits and stricter standards for the next one to come. He can't steal your peace of mind, because is it love when he stole your peace of mind? Is it love when so easily said goodbye? Is it love when you cry, and cry and cry? (props to Ari for the quote) You know the answer. (and “my daddy always told me if he makes you cry he ain't the one, you better run from him”, props to Ari again for those song lyrics)

I wish you all the best and I will see you soon. xx